I have been working a pretty sweet job over Christmas. I was hired as a bartender in an incredible five-star hotel in London. The pay is great, the tips are great, the cocktails amazing, the team lovely, I was reimbursed for my lovely Massimo Dutti jumpsuit uniform! All in all my idea of a dream job. Even better, I can return in all my breaks to work in any of the bars across the collection of hotels.
However, there is a catch. I, unfortunately, have been on the receiving end of a lot of comments about my body from customers. As the clientele is rather wealthy, a certain level of entitlement comes with their deep pockets. One night a customer even made a joke about me putting weight on over Christmas. I had to take myself off to the bathroom. I cried, composed myself, and returned to the bar five minutes later.
A component of recovering from an Eating Disorder, which I struggle with constantly, is that people don’t know. Sometimes I want to wear a sign on my forehead, It would read: I have fucking anorexia, please do not approach my bar to sit down and start guessing how much I weigh, asking how much I weigh, and ogling at my figure. Also, as a manager, please realise that when you tell me to eat the chocolate, I eat the chocolate. Something very hard for me to do as it is not a designated snack or meal, so please don’t joke about how it is going to make me so, so fat. Because for Kevin that is already a certified fact.
I know I am going to continue to have to deal with this as I go throughout my life and persevere in my recovery. It becomes easier with time and the shell becomes stronger and harder. I know the commentary is because other people project their problems onto me. As my colleague told me as I left the bathroom: be strong. So that is what I aspire to be in 2022 strong and resilient to inappropriate commentary in any workplace setting.
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